David Is Grace's Husband; He Knew Her Before Sam; He Needs Her to Remember; She Does Not Remember; He Has Been Arrested; He Will Only Speak to Grace

The bed and breakfast. The window. The milk. The gun. The arrest. The handcuffs. The revelation. The Gazette has followed this story from the island and is filing the full account.

The man from the island, whose arrival this paper flagged in issue seven, has revealed his name as David. pssn0407He is, per his own account, Grace Bennett's husband from before the fire that destroyed her memory. The Gazette is reporting this as stated by David and notes it has not been independently verified, that Grace does not remember him, and that his methods of introduction - which have included standing at windows at night, interrogating Jessica about her family at the bed and breakfast he checked into, standing over Grace while she slept, and ultimately kidnapping her - are not the methods this paper would recommend for a man trying to jog someone's memory. David did note that he merely brought her back to his room and this is all a misunderstanding after she had fainted. Is this his truth? or is he just trying to get escape?

The Gazette notes, on the subject of the Bennett Bed and Breakfast: it exists. It has a guest book. The Bennett family has apparently operated it for some time. It seems to be attached to the giftshop. Please write the paper if you know a good cartographer, we need to update our understanding of harmony pssn0407. When the Bennett house burned down and sank into the earth in issue five, this paper reported the family as homeless. The Gazette is now revising its understanding of the Bennett family's property portfolio and notes that the question of why they did not simply stay at the bed and breakfast when their house burned down has not been answered by any available source and the Gazette is not going to be the one to ask Sam Bennett about it directly but is noting it here.

Grace spilled her milk when David surprised her in tabatha's kitchen. Sam noticed the spilled milk, investigated, and found them almost immediately in David's bed and breakfast room. David was arrested. He refuses to speak to anyone but Grace. He has asked Grace to release him from his handcuffs and later, his cell. The Gazette notes that David's threat level has diminished with each passing scene and is currently hard to assess. David has insisted grace not disclose their conversation to Sam

Upon checking into the Bennet Bed And Breakfast, David brandished a gun and consulted a photograph of Grace from what sources identified as an issue of Disappearing Houses Monthly. The Gazette notes this publication and notes it has a very specific editorial focus and that Harmony's house situation warrants coverage in it. Grace had a vision when David confronted her outside the Joint engagement party and fainted. The Gazette is noting the vision and noting that Grace's powers, which arrived in issue five, continue to operate independently of Grace's comfort level with them.

The Gazette must also note, on the question of David's claim: Grace Bennett has no memory of her life prior to being saved by Sam from a fire. The Gazette has been aware of this fact for several issues and considers it one of the more significant unresolved pieces of Grace's documented character, outside of the unsloved arson murder of her sister faith. If David is who he says he is, then Sam and Grace's marriage may be complicated in ways this paper is not yet in a position to fully assess. pssn0407The Gazette is watching. The Gazette notes that a proper fire department might have produced records that could resolve some of this. This paper has been calling for one since issue three and is renewing that call now with additional urgency.


The Case for a Proper Fire Department in Harmony: Renewed, With New Evidence

The Gazette has previously noted Harmony's inadequate fire response infrastructure. The Bennett house burned down and sank. The Harmony Fire Department arrived, lent out jackets, and left. This paper now adds to its file: the absence of proper fire records from Grace's original fire means a woman cannot verify who she is or whether she has a prior husband. The Gazette considers this a direct consequence of institutional fire department failure with personal identity implications and is raising it at the editorial level. Harmony needs a fire department. It needs one with records. The Gazette is not going to stop saying this.

Alistair Throws Julian Under the Bus; Offers to Make Sheridan His Heir; Luis Finds the Bug; Stomps It; Delivers a Message; Alistair Poisons the Wedding Ring pssn0407

The gas lighting. The second gas lighting. The bug sweep. The message. The ring. The jeweller. The Gazette is reporting the full Alistair operation this week and notes it was a busy one even by Alistair's documented standards.

Alistair Crane told Sheridan about the mask pssn0407, threw Julian under the bus, and offered to make her his heir. Sheridan asked why he did not come to her funeral. The Gazette notes that Sheridan was buried alive in a period predating this paper's coverage, and that this is a reasonable question to ask of a father. Alistair's answer was not recorded as satisfactory. Sheridan fell for the offer anyway.pssn0407 Julian and Rebecca listened on speakerphone. pssn0407

Sheridan then confirmed to Alistair that she knew about the gaslighting operation. Alistair then gaslit her again. She is so very gas lightable she fell for it like a total rube. The Gazette notes this sequence and notes it is the second consecutive issue in which Sheridan has seen through Alistair's operation and then not seen through it. Alistair grabbed her and told her directly that she will not marry Luis. Luis entered at this moment. Sheridan appears to have seen through it properly this time. The Gazette is cautiously noting this as a more durable clarity than previous iterations.

Luis arranged a bug sweep of the cabin. He immediately found the RF surveillance device. He delivered a message to Alistair through it before destroying it.

Luis's message to Alistair, delivered through the Crane surveillance bug before stomping it and causing feedback loud enough to hurt the Crane men's ears: "KICK ROCKS BOZOS WE ARE IN LUV." The Gazette considers this one of the finest statements this paper has had occasion to report in eight issues of publication. It is being archived.

Alistair's response was to lace Sheridan's wedding ring with poison, pssn0407 pssn0407Fold the jeweller Mr. Bradbury into the plan, and arrange for the ring to be given to Luis to present to Sheridan on the wedding day. Luis put the ring on Sheridan. She wore it to her own bridal shower. Gwen handled the ring at the shower and fainted, then recovered as if nothing had happened. Tabitha noticed the ring, took it for safekeeping, and she and Timmy examined it and quickly identified the poison. The Gazette notes that a witch noticing a poison ring while the assembled women of Harmony did not is a significant argument for keeping a witch in your social circle.


Town Attractiveness Up 23%; Gwank Confirmed?; Hank Hires the Strippers

Hank is becoming a police officer. The Gazette notes this institutional development and notes that the Harmony Police Department, which this paper has documented as operationally compromised since issue one, is now receiving an infusion of someone the viewing community is calling Hunk.

MazerDeco · Statistical Analysis "Hank has single handedly raised the total town attractiveness by 23%"

Hank asked Gwen out for a drink before the wedding. Viewers have named this pairing Gwank. The Gazette is logging the designation. Gwen subsequently went to confess her sins to Father Lonigan.pssn0407The Gazette does not have the full list of sins but notes the confession was sought in the same week that Gwen is sitting on information about who sent the email that ruined Ethan's life. The Gazette notes the timing. Hank also took credit this week for tipping off the girls about the bachelor party stripper plan. The Gazette covers this fully below.

The Bachelor Party Is at the Youth Centre; Luis Is Writing His Vows in the Corner; Male Strippers Are Procured; Masks Are Exchanged; Nobody Behaved as Expected

The bachelor party for Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald was held at the Harmony Youth Centre. Sheridan had expressed concern about strippers. She was, on the evidence, correct to worry - the party involved bros drinking beer and playing basketball at the youth center pssn0407. Luis spent part of his own bachelor party in the corner working on his vows. The Gazette notes this as characteristic and does not criticise it.

Hank had, in fact, arranged an elaborate stripper scheme. Luis and Ethan left the youth center when the strippers arrived, being uncomfortable. Outside the Lenox house they encountered the male strippers and convinced them to exchange clothes as they thought the best way to get over their stripper aversion is immersion therapy. Luis and Ethan then arrived at the bridal shower in full stripper costume, Zoro Boyz, expecting this to be funny. pssn0407 The assembled women of Harmony, pssn0407who had been tipped off by Hank and Chad, were extremely enthusiastic. Sheridan and Theresa, described by sources as very drunk and extremely into it, stripped the boys and kissed them.pssn0407 pssn0407Luis and Ethan removed their Zorro masks expecting disgust. They found the opposite. The Gazette notes that the plan to embarrass their partners was itself embarrassing.

kink_shaman · On the Subject of Kay Being Nice "I've seen witches, demons, and talking dolls. But Kay being nice, I don't believe it."

The Ouija Board Spells Y-O-U C-A-N-T; Tabitha Contacts Hecuba's Hot Tub Servant; He Looked Like Stewart From MAD TV

Tabitha consulted the Ouija pssn0407 board this week to ask whether she could stop the incoming destruction. The board spelled YOU CAN'T. Tabitha and Timmy then used Hecuba's hot-tub vision apparatus pssn0407 to contact the hot tub servant, who bore a considerable resemblance to Stewart from MAD TV. pssn0407The Gazette made an effort to confirm whether this was Michael McDonald and was unable to do so due to, in this paper's own assessment, laziness. The Gazette is noting its own failure here. The resemblance was striking. The investigation remains incomplete. pssn0407
pssn0407

Tabitha Faints When Warlock Island Is Mentioned; Her Hair Goes White While Lying About It; A Raven With Two Crossed Sceptres Is Found; The Island Holds a Secret That Will Rock Harmony to Its Core

The senior trip. The snakes and bears. The hair. The raven. The confession to Timmy. Reese's follow-up questions. The Gazette is filing Warlock Island as a significant upcoming storyline and intends to cover it thoroughly.pssn0407

The Bennett children, still resident at the Lenox house, announced a senior trip and mentioned Warlock Island. Tabitha fainted. Upon recovery she explained the island away as having snakes and bears. Reese was not satisfied with this explanation and followed up. Sam asked Tabitha to tell the story of how the island was named. Tabitha's hair went white while she was lying about it. Timmy subsequently fixed her hair, dressed in what sources describe as a mad scientist hairdresser outfit. The Gazette notes the outfit and notes that Timmy's wardrobe this issue has included a pirate, a mad scientist hairdresser, sparkle bridal, and standard Timmy. This paper considers this range impressive.

Tabitha confided to Timmy that the island holds a secret that will rock Harmony to its core. Charity found a picture of a raven with two crossed sceptres in a book and connected it to Warlock Island. The Gazette is noting the raven and the sceptres and will return to them. Tabitha has begun to feel that the incoming storm requires her to strike a deal with the friends in the basement. The Gazette notes that Hecuba is still in the basement and that the friends in the basement situation has been an open item since issue one. The Gazette does not consider a deal with the basement friends to be a resolution. It considers it a complication, which is different. There is a new floating head demon in play that looks a lot like Father L pssn0407


Reese Pulls Tabitha's Scarf in Front of Everyone; Reveals the Stitching; Everyone Still Sides With Tabitha

Reese noticed Tabitha wearing a scarf in summer weather and questioned her about it. He then pulled the scarf away in front of the assembled group, exposing the stitching from this week's decapitation and reattachment. Everyone present sided with Tabitha. The Gazette notes this as Reese's seventh or eighth consecutive correct assessment of a supernatural situation that was dismissed by all present. The Gazette believes Reese. The Gazette notes it has been saying this for eight issues and will continue to say it.


Timmy Breaks Into the Crane House; Julian Ties Him to a Chair; They Become Friends Instead; Timmy Offers to Kill Sheridan So Julian Doesn't Have To

Timmy broke into the Crane household and was caught by Julian, who was in a drunken rage. pssn0407Julian tied Timmy to a chair and tortured him. pssn0407 pssn0407After the interrogation they decided to be friends instead and knocked back a buncha martimmies.Timmy, motivated by self-preservation, offered to kill Sheridan on Julian's behalf. Julian was intrigued. The Gazette is noting this development and is not confident it will be acted upon, given Timmy's established conscience, but is tracking it regardless.


Chad Breaks Into the Daily Private Lives; Whitney Followed Him; A Leather Glove Grabs His Mouth; It Is Whitney

Chad broke into the Daily Private Lives office to recover the email information for Ethan as a wedding present. He was not alone. A leather glove grabbed him from behind. It was Whitney, who had followed him to protect him from prison. The Gazette notes Whitney's motive and notes it is a reasonable one. The Gazette also notes that two people breaking into a newspaper office is not more legal than one person doing so, but does not pursue this point further at this time.

Grace Throws a Shower in Tabitha's Living Room Without Telling Tabitha; Theresa Receives a Love Candle; Gwen Blows It Out; Timmy Is Dressed in Bows; Ivy Apologises to Grace

Grace Bennett organised a bridal shower in Tabitha's living room without informing Tabitha. Tabitha was in the attic with Timmy and has been, by her own account, unreachable. The shower proceeded. Theresa received a love candle. Gwen blew it out.pssn0407 The Gazette notes the candle's extinction and declines to assign metaphorical significance to it in print, while acknowledging that the metaphorical significance is obvious. The girls dressed Timmy in the bows and ribbons from the opened gifts. Timmy appears to have accepted this with his characteristic equanimity. Please enjoy these timpics pssn0407 pssn0407

Ivy Crane apologised to Grace at the shower and announced her intention to move on from Sam. The beef between Ivy and Grace, which this paper has documented across multiple issues and which contributed to at least one hospitalisation, one pregnancy loss, three thrown vases, a curse, and a powersuit, has been squashed. The Gazette notes this resolution and notes that it arrived at a bridal shower in a witch's living room, which is as good a place as any for a reconciliation in Harmony.

Tabitha's wind chimes in the attic began chiming during the party. Tabitha told Timmy that chiming wind chimes mean someone is in terrible pain and that the chimes can predict the future. The Gazette notes the wind chimes as a new piece of Lenox house infrastructure with documented prophetic function and will be tracking them.


Kay Prays for Help Staying on the Straight and Narrow; Statue Cries

Kay Bennett prayed at church this week for help remaining on the straight and narrow following the return of her soul. During the prayer, the statue cried. The Gazette is reporting this accurately. Nobody present appears to know what it means. The Gazette does not know what it means. The Gazette is noting it and intends to find out.

Norma Bates Has Been Dispatched to Kill Timmy and Tabitha; Her Skeleton Father Gave Directions; She Found Their Names in the Guest Book; She Called Ahead pssn0407

The Gazette must report that Tabitha and Timmy have received a call this week from Norma, of the Bates Motel, who has been tasked by her skeleton father with killing them. Norma located Timmy and Tabitha's names in her guest book, dusted it off, and departed with her orders after calling ahead. The Gazette notes that calling ahead to inform a target of an incoming assassination is a procedural choice that has not previously been documented in this paper's coverage of Harmony's various active murder operations, and considers it a distinguishing feature of Norma's approach.

The Gazette notes that Harmony already has an active Alistair-originated murder order on Sheridan and Luis, an active TC mandate to kill Julian, a poisoned wedding ring, and now an incoming Norma Bates situation targeting the Lenox household. The Gazette observes that Harmony's active murder threat count is currently at its highest documented level and notes this with appropriate concern. This paper is at capacity for active threats and is requesting that no new ones be initiated until at least one of the existing ones is resolved.

The Gazette · Editorial Position Not enough was happening with the double wedding. The Gazette notes that Norma Bates has been called in. This is the situation we are in.