Sheridan Is Diana Now; Has Amnesia; Lost Her Voice; Recovered It via Clam Chowder; Is Being Treated on an Island by a Doctor Whose Licence Was Revoked After His Space Travel Theories Were Exposed

The S.S. Exposition. Brian O'Leary and his absent sleeves. The Hawaii shirt doctor. The chowder. The name Diana. The Gazette is reporting all of this as accurately as the situation permits, which is to say: accurately.

Sheridan Crane is aboard the S.S. Exposition, where she is being treated well by all parties except the captain, who is doing everything in his power to make her stay uncomfortable. The Gazette does not know the captain's motive and notes it is not the most pressing open question in this issue but notes it regardless. Sheridan was transported to a nearby island where she was assessed by a doctor in an open Hawaiian shirt and shell necklace. The Gazette notes the Hawaiian shirt as a detail it would not normally include but which sources considered relevant to the overall credibility assessment.

The doctor has, it emerges, lost his medical licence following the public exposure of his theories on space travel. The Gazette notes this and notes that the man treating the woman who was recently in a boat explosion, cremated without being in the urn, and pulled from the sea by fishermen is operating without a current licence on the basis of theories that have been publicly discredited. The Gazette notes that Sheridan is in Harmony-adjacent hands, which is perhaps fitting.0417

Sheridan lost her voice. She recovered it by eating New England clam chowder. The Gazette is reporting this accurately and notes it is not the strangest medical development this paper has covered but notes it has a specific quality. She awoke in good spirits. She has amnesia and believes her name is Diana.

P_Chops · Ongoing Assessment "Sheridan is really bad at dying."

The Gazette endorses P_Chops's assessment and notes it has now been true across three separate near-death events in this paper's thirteen-issue run. Brian O'Leary, who rescued Sheridan, and has been unable to reach Julian to report that she is alive. He has concluded Julian probably would not believe him anyway. Having received news that Sheridan is dead, Brian questions whether the woman he rescued is actually Sheridan at all. The Gazette notes this is a reasonable question given the amnesia and the Diana situation, and notes that this paper has been following Sheridan long enough to confirm she is herself, whatever she currently believes her name to be.

Julian Attempts to Tamper With Ivy's Life Support; Is Then Beaten by Eve, Luis, and Ethan Consecutively; Ivy Attacks Rebecca With What vjpcat Believes Is a Hoverround

The gauntlet. Three separate beatings. Eve punches him at least three times. The hoverround. The Gazette considers this one of the more satisfying sequences it has been asked to document in thirteen issues and is documenting it in full.

Julian Crane attempted to tamper with Ivy's life support at the hospital this week. The Gazette is noting this as the latest in Julian's documented actions and notes that the trajectory from vase-water consumption to attempted life support tampering is one this paper has tracked across thirteen issues with mounting concern. The tampering was not completed. What followed was, instead, a gauntlet.0417

Pilar fainted when she learned of Theresa's marriage to Julian, woke up, and attacked Julian. Dr. Eve Russell sent Julian to her office, spoke with Pilar and the girls, heard the full story, recognised the same method of operation applied to her eighteen years ago, went to Julian's location, and punched him at least three times. Julian escaped Eve and was immediately attacked by Luis and Ethan. The Gazette notes the sequential nature of these events - Pilar, then Eve, then Luis and Ethan - and characterises it as a gauntlet. Julian received beatings from four separate people in one episode block. The Gazette considers this notable and does not mourn it.

Eve Russell punching Julian at least three times after recognising that what happened to Theresa mirrors what happened to her as a young woman years ago is the most significant piece of character action this paper has documented in the Eve Russell file and the Gazette is filing it prominently.

Ivy, having received a legal letter barring her from the Crane mansion past midnight - which she correctly attributed to Rebecca - arrived at the mansion in a wheelchair and attempted to use it as a weapon against Rebecca. Rebecca attempted to have Pilar fired. Julian refused. The Gazette notes Julian declining to fire Pilar as an action inconsistent with his otherwise documented character this week and notes it without explanation.

vjpcat · Vehicle Assessment "I think it's a Hoverround."

The Gazette notes vjpcat's assessment and considers the Hoverround classification plausible without further investagation to what a hoverround might be. Whether it was a standard e-wheelchair or a Hoverround, the Gazette notes that Ivy, recovering from a lightning strike and surgery, arrived at the Crane mansion in a motorised or wheeled conveyance and deployed it aggressively against Rebecca within the same visit. The Gazette considers this consistent with Ivy's documented character and notes that at no point in thirteen issues has Ivy backed down from anything.

Beth · Return Notice

Beth Is Back at the Book Café

Beth has returned to the Book Café. The Gazette notes the return and notes it is the second time Beth's reappearance has been worth documenting. The Gazette is watching Beth and notes its watch on Beth has been ongoing since issue three. Beth does not know the Gazette is watching. This is fine.

Basement Report · Floating Head Desk

Tabitha and Timmy Are Summoned to the Basement; Attempt to Go to Hawaii Instead; Their Feet Freeze; The Floating Head Demands a Report; Tabitha Reads From Hidden Passions; The Head Is Not Satisfied; Kay Decides to Be Evil Again 0417

Tabitha and Timmy received a summons from the basement entities this week. Their proposed response was to go to Hawaii instead. Their feet froze to the ground. The Gazette notes that the basement entities are, on this evidence, more powerful than previously assessed, and notes that this paper has been tracking the basement situation since issue six with increasing concern and that the concern was warranted.

In the basement, they found Hecuba's bottle and were reprimanded by the spirits for failing to kill Charity. The entity making the demands appears to be a floating head of considerable authority. The floating head demanded a report. Tabitha was unprepared. Timmy, in an act of logistical support, suggested she read from Hidden Passions as a substitute for having an actual report. The head had already read it and noted it lacked the real dirt the head was after. Tabitha improvised a plan on the spot. The plan involves manipulating Kay into being evil again.

The floating head relented on the condition that if Tabitha and Timmy fail, it will throw them into a fire pit. The Gazette notes that Timmy is, per prior documentation, quite flammable. This is not a condition Tabitha and Timmy can afford to fail. The Gazette is updating its assessment of the basement situation from "unsatisfactory containment" to "active operational threat."

Kay Bennett, whose soul was returned to her body in issue seven and who has since been operating with inconsistent results, learned this week that she was born out of wedlock. She is a bastard. Upon learning this, she decided to be evil again. The Gazette notes that Kay's soul lasted approximately six issues before this development and notes that the timing of the revelation - immediately following the basement entities' demand for Kay's renewed villainy - is, at minimum, convenient for Tabitha's plan. The Gazette is noting the convenience and is watching Kay.

The Gazette · Timmy Assessment Timmy suggested reading from Hidden Passions as a substitute for a prepared report to a powerful supernatural entity. This is either the worst idea Timmy has had or a genuinely creative solution under pressure. The Gazette notes it was effective and declines to criticise it further.

Harmony Desk · Relationships

Sam Makes Peace With David; Grace and David Plan a Divorce; Charity Is Frightened by Leaves and Wind; The Premonition About Sheridan Has Come Trueish

Sam Bennett made peace with David Hastings this week. Grace and David are planning a divorce. The Gazette notes this as the most orderly resolution of the David situation that this paper had reason to expect and notes it cautiously given David's track record. The Gazette has watched David goad Sam, produce contradictory documentation, and benefit from a priest who has given mutually exclusive sworn accounts on two separate occasions. The Gazette is noting the divorce plans and noting that plans are not the same as conclusions.

Charity Standish received the news of Sheridan's death - which the Gazette notes is the death Sheridan has not actually completed - and became very frightened. Leaves and wind have been following her around and distressing her. The Gazette notes that Charity's premonition about Sheridan dying if she married Luis came true insofar as there was a boat explosion and Sheridan was presumed dead, and that Charity is now taking her premonitions with appropriate seriousness. The Gazette notes it has also been taking Charity's premonitions seriously since at least issue four and notes that this paper's confidence in Charity's powers has proven warranted across multiple events.

S.S. Exposition · Brian O'Leary Profile

Brian O'Leary: Hates Sleeves; Rescued Sheridan; Could Not Reach Julian; Has Concluded Julian Would Not Believe Him Anyway; Is Probably Right

0417Brian O'Leary, who rescued Sheridan from the sea and hates sleeves, attempted to contact Julian Crane to report that she is alive. Julian was unavailable due to being beat upon by Eve. Brian has concluded Julian probably would not believe him anyway. The Gazette notes Brian's read on Julian and considers it accurate based on this paper's thirteen-issue documentation of Julian's receptiveness to inconvenient information, which is low. Brian has received news that Sheridan is dead and now questions whether the woman he rescued is actually Sheridan. The Gazette notes this is a reasonable position for someone who did not watch issues one through twelve. The Gazette notes Brian is new. The Gazette is cautiously interested in Brian and is noting he hates sleeves, which is a strong character position to establish early.

Eve Russell · Characterisation Update

Eve Recognises Julian's Method of Operation From Her Youth; The Gazette Updates Its File

The Gazette has been tracking the question of Eve Russell's connection to Julian Crane since the floppy disc situation introduced the possibility of Chad's parentage several issues ago. This week's confirmation that Eve recognises what happened to Theresa as the same method applied to her years ago is the most direct piece of Eve/Julian historical evidence this paper has received. The Gazette notes it and notes it prominently. The Gazette notes that Eve punched Julian at least three times immediately after making this connection, which is the appropriate response. The Gazette has updated the Eve Russell file accordingly and notes it is now a considerably more interesting file than it was at the start of this paper's run.